On Saturday night, I was hanging out with Seventeen Year Old, talking about a lot of troubling societal issues and cuddling. At one point he went to the bathroom, leaving me to my thoughts - a dangerous idea at the best of times. When he came back, I was staring at my hardwood floor and before he could say a word and without my eyes moving from the ground, this spewed forth from my mouth:
"You know what I just realized? I struggle a lot with this notion that I must curb any femininity in my nature, but the fact is I gain so much strength from it. I catch myself in these moments where I know I'm invoking the Feminine and I feel powerful because of it. We need to draw on both the Masculine and the Feminine to fully realize our full potential. Just think of the jock in the locker room who strives so hard to maintain a solely masculine output of energy and how much more he could be were he to actually let the Feminine work within him. This isn't simply an issue of gender or sexuality. I have straight male friends who are very much in touch with their Feminine and I've conversely known gay men who abhor any sign of femininity. I just think that's so wrong. The powers of Gender are not contingent on what sex organs we have. I mean, when I'm interacting with someone, it's not with my penis. I mean, it can be, but even that is only a fraction of what's really mingling in the situation. There are a million factors that make up each person and yet with all these potentially opposing qualities, everyone is just fundamentally looking for someone to complete them. I know that sounds cheesy, but it's true. It's like this million-piece puzzle that's near impossible to complete and then when we do, we get treated with such hate because our parts don't match the way theirs do. It's such a small part and it doesn't effect them at all. I don't think they understand that we're all just feeling the same thing. They can't get past the biology. And what are they so afraid of? That we'll rise up like some faggy nation of Israel against Pharaoh so they have to enslave us first? Don't they see that they should be gracious because they get to have something we don't in family, rather than to loathe our existence with every fiber of their beings? We each have entire universes contained in our souls and they hate us for what we don't have!"
I finished and looked up at him for a response. He paused, looked me in the eye and said, "You got all that from the floor?"
1 comment:
Davey, I love your blog!
In other news, your blog gives me a headache... white on black is just not the way to go for blogging.
Gender issues are a fascinating oddity. I think my sister and I were raised fairly genderless - as a result, things like knitting, sports, baking, whatever were not feminine or masculine activities, rather just things that we did.
For me, it's never been about finding my femininity, but in adulthood, I think I'm finally starting to understand my masculinity.
The moral of this story is: Raise your children androgenously; they may turn out as butch chicks and femme boys, but they'll be tolerant, haha!
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