Saturday, May 03, 2008

A Graduated Boy

It is over. At long last, done. And it was great. Not perfect. No. It never would be, not in a million years, such is my performance psychology. But I feel pride and, let me tell you, it's been a while since that sentiment has come to call. I received messages all day from people that had to bail at the last moment, but when it came down to it, the people that I loved were there. The oddest group, too. Random friends from my childhood, the quiet lady from work who I talked to twice, dear friends whom I've lived what feels like two lifetimes without. Even my nearest and dearest who couldn't be at the recital itself showed up in a small drove to the reception and we made merry for the rest of the night. When they arrived, it was like something out of (Heaven forgive me for this reference) The Lord of the Rings when that effing scary ghost army appears to back up the troupes. Heroes, they are. In the end, they were as much a part of the experience as the audience. You have to really examine the details to understand life. Love is not just sitting in a dark room listening to someone sing for an hour and a half; it's also driving across down after a 3 hour recording session just to show up for the reception. It's all the same.

Things are just better today. I've felt like this awful adult for the past month, so stressed and sarcastic, with no time for anyone else. Last night, on stage, I was a little kid all of a sudden, growing younger with each passing song that I released from my soul. And now I'm light again. It's the feeling you get in the second just before the e high hits when you know something amazing is going to happen. That feel struck me in the moment before I walked out onto that stage and it's just lived with me ever since. So lovely. This, the day after, feels as though I'm in the throes of it, being in love with everyone and everything. My clothes feel softer, my coffee tastes better. Hmmmm...

My-ami : part 2, coming soon.

1 comment:

Michael Park said...

Yay, it was awesome!!
I read these posts backwards, so I made the size bigger... DON'T hit ctrl-+ twice... the white gets extra nauseatingly bright!